Don’t ya just hate it when you really want to know how someone’s day went and they just say “fine”?
Maybe the problem isn’t the other person. Maybe it’s the question.
Open questions open conversation. Closed questions have one word, shallow or “duh” answers.
Next time you want to go deeper with someone in conversation try one of these three types of questions.
- Sharing questions-
- What was the most exciting thing that happened to you today?
- Tell me about the last time you laughed at something.
- What’s the most difficult thing you are facing right now?
- Feelings questions-
- What three things bring you the most happiness right now?
- What is something that makes you sad? or angry?
- Who are the three people you feel closest to (at work, or at school, or on the team…) and why?
- Thinking questions-
- What is your current focus?
- If that turned out to be a success, what would it look like?
- What is the next thing on your list?
- What is holding you back?
Taking a little extra time to think about how you can go deeper with someone can be the tipping point between having a shallow conversation/relationship or a growing one!
Have fun growing deeper!
Cindy Scott is a professional Life Coach, Coach Trainer and founder of Bridges Coaching. She has her roots in Elim - is an EBI grad and is ordained through Elim Fellowship along with holding a Masters in Ministry and Lifeforming Leadership Coach Training Certification. Cindy loves helping people or teams build bridges to what could be through the coaching paradigm and/or helping them understand their destiny by design!
She and her husband Eric, Care Pastor at Elim Gospel Church, have four grown children, enjoy biking on the Erie Canal Trail and love a leisurely trip to Starbucks.